“Every beginning has an end.”
A phrase we often repeat with pessimism, and sometimes with fear of loss and
departure, and at other times with certainty and deep faith that everything is
destined to fade and come to an end. We also see it as hope for a reality more
beautiful than what we experience in the present.
Many things in life require endings, whether by our own will and choice or against
it. If we look at relationships, for example, how many relationships ended without
us having the power to choose their endings, but circumstances and fate dictated
them? Childhood acquaintances with whom our relationships continued, only for paths
to suddenly part without warning when they moved to another neighborhood or settled
in a new place. How many times were we forced to bid farewell to those we loved for
the last time, kissing their foreheads because their souls had departed and they
moved on to another home? How many colleagues from work or study do we no longer
know anything about, without realizing that the last possible day we would ever see
them was the day we wore our graduation robes and caps?
On the other hand, how many times have we chosen, of our own free will, to cut off
harmful relationships that drained our emotions, memories, and efforts? A wife who,
after long suffering and great patience, chose to end a relationship that lasted for
decades. Another person whose friend’s constant harassment disturbed his sleep, so
he chose to return that relationship to a superficial level. A husband and wife who
ended their journey together because, in their view, there was no longer harmony
between them. A young man who chose to end his journey in a certain job because it
no longer fulfilled his passion, nor provided the knowledge he was eagerly seeking,
or because of a manager’s arrogance and oppression.
Endings in our lives are countless, whether small or great. Regardless of whether
those endings seem positive or negative, whether they come by our choice or are
imposed upon us, whether they appear right or terribly wrong, we all realize that
even this world we rush through in pursuit of what we want will one day come to an
end. It is no secret, nor something surprising, to expect an end to everything
around us, starting with relationships and followed by everything else. I do not
state these truths as a call for pessimism, but knowing them makes their weight
lighter and easier to accept.
The most important question is “how things should end,” especially when it comes to
endings that fall within our will and personal choices. Everything else lies beyond
our human capacity. Why is the step of endings in our world so often drawn with
ugliness and bitterness?
Things should end with kindness, no matter how difficult staying may be, no matter
how exhausting and draining the journey has been. Even if you feel you were the
powerless party in a relationship where appreciation was lacking, or where the
circumstances were never satisfying but rather painful, and each passing day made
you feel guilty for continuing—if you choose to leave or end it all, “leave with
love.” Remember your calm moments and your beautiful days. All relationships
fluctuate between highs and lows. Overlook the pain and sorrow that covered them,
remember the joyful and happy details, and make the final memory a bright hope
reflected in the faces of those involved. Leave places and people with a good
memory. Forgive, pardon, and let go of burdens that darken your days. Make the road
behind you green and water it with joy, for perhaps one day you may return along it
and life may reunite you with those you once left. Let the path of return be bright
and worthy of you. Wave with love and move forward to whatever you find suitable for
yourself—whether starting new relationships, exploring new places, or something
else. Carry gratitude as much as you can for those who once loved you and held a
place in your heart, even if things have not gone as they should recently. Do not be
an enemy to anyone. Love everyone. Please, “wave with love”—for yourself first, then
for them, and then leave.